What Would You Do If Money Wasn't An Issue?

Hello everyone and welcome today to the Dr Sam Collins podcast. Today I want to invite you to think about a very controversial topic, which is money. Not how much you have or how much you earn or even where you invest it. That is definitely not my expertise. I want to talk about the role that money plays in the decisions you make, the opportunities that perhaps you pursue or you don't pursue, and the life that you allow yourself to imagine based on what you think about money and the difference that you can make in the world.
So topic today, money, money, money, money makes the world go round. Over the years, I…

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been increasingly convinced myself through my own personal experience. And I remember having many issues with money growing up. My mom was always in debt and you know, a big one on the credit cards. And as a little girl, I remember having to hide the credit card statements from my dad when they came through the letterbox in the, in the post. And so I grew up sort of seeing her struggle with money and hiding what she was spending and overspending and not budgeting, that kind of thing.
And always having to ask my dad for money because she, well, up until I was about 13, stayed at home looking after me. So she didn't have sort of her own money in that sense. And I grew up thinking, I am always going to make my own money. I'm never going to rely on a man to have to. ask for money. That was my ultimate thing I never wanted to do. So, you know, we all have issues, I think, about money and it governs in our adulthood and in our workplaces so much of what we do.
So that's what I want to talk about today. And the question I have is what would you do if money wasn't an issue?

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And when I ask that question, something interesting often emerges because people, when that's sort of taken out of the way, ideas come up and possibilities appear and we begin to think about ourselves and our work and what we really want to do and the contribution we really want to make and the conversations we really want to have and the future we really want to create. But yet almost immediately after that, it's almost like, oh, that was a pipe dream because, and then all these fears come in often, which are associated with money.
Other things too, I know like time and who we know and our networks and our skills and are we good enough and all that stuff. But today we're going to be talking about money. Now, before you get… mad at me in any way. I love money, right? Like money's good. Money enables us to do the things that we need to do and look after the people we need to look after. So I'm not saying, you know, become, live in an ashram and have no money and be on the streets.
Money matters. I get it. All right. We have bills to pay, responsibilities to meet, a future to plan for. So this, this episode is not about pretending that money doesn't matter. In fact, I would say that money matters hugely. But I wonder whether there's a difference between being financially responsible and allowing fear about money to quietly make every important decision on your behalf. And often we don't really consciously know that that's there.
And I wonder whether some of the choices you are making today are being driven more by fear than by freedom. And I'm with you, I do this, we all do this. And it isn't, it's only when we actually take a moment to look at this and figure out, okay, am I going to be ruled by fear or am I going to be ruled by possibility and having that trust in ourselves? So I wonder what might become possible if you developed greater trust in yourself and your ability to

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create value, your ability to learn, to adapt, and your ability to generate resources that you need to live a meaningful life and make a bigger difference. And I remember sort of making this connection between making money and making a difference, because I sort of grew up with this idea that making money was this sort of necessary evil and you need to go into a job, Sam, when you can make money. And it was told to me that I needed to be an accountant or a lawyer or something in banking, which for me was just something I really did not want to do.
But no one in my family had ever made any money, so these were the routes that were suggested to me as the ways to make money. And it was never, in fact, I remember my dad saying to me that, you know, you can't do anything creative or artistic or anything like that because you'll never make any money. So I grew up with these ideas. And then even when I started Aspire when I was 29, 25 years ago, I remember my first husband saying to me, you're never going to make any money because you're too nice.
And so there was this connection between In order to make money, you have to be some mean, nasty, terrible person. And money is this sort of way of paying for things and, you know, getting your next car or your next house and the rest of it, which I, you know, part of it, I suppose. But there wasn't any connection between helping people and making a difference, which is ultimately what I wanted to do when I started Aspire.
So I had all this ran and ran in my head and stuff about money and really to start making that connection actually. The more money I can make, the more, yes, I can cover my expenses, but at the same time, I can invest in my business. I can invest in myself. I can do projects. I can make a bigger difference. I could go to different countries and help different people and different women's groups.
And so making that connection was massive for me, that making money equals making a difference. And in fact, for many, many years, I've had this fantasy.

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that there will be eventually, I'm not sure it's going to happen in my lifetime, but maybe in yours, where there's no such thing as a for-profit organization. And actually there's no such thing as a not-for-profit or a charity that actually the businesses merge and become social businesses and social enterprises, all businesses, not just some small businesses and as many amazing social enterprises out there, but the big corporations. Can you imagine? the big corporations become social enterprises, meaning that they are adopting a triple bottom line, not only being driven, can you only imagine it, that corporations would not only be driven by profits and shareholder value in the next quarter results, but they are measured on a triple bottom line of three things, their impact, their positive impact on people and planet as well as profit. people, profit and planet.
And so this is this sort of fantasy that I have. And so, and I know that many people are working on this now and want their organisations to be measured in this way. So rather than being measured only on financial performance, but we're also measuring businesses on that impact that they have on their people and not just on a lip service, tick box type of way on their people and on the communities and world around them.
I mean, can you only imagine because

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organizations, corporations have a huge, massive impact on this planet. And I often find myself wondering about this triple bottom line, if we were to not only apply it to businesses, corporations, organizations, charities, but to apply it to ourselves and our own lives and ask ourselves, okay, I'm not going to measure myself simply on how much money I'm earning, but also what's the impact that I'm having on the people around me and what's the impact that I'm having on my community and even on the world and the wider communities and even the planet, right?
You know, so I think this is something that I want to address today and think about how our attitudes towards money are affecting your wellbeing, your relationships, your health. but also your sense of purpose and your contribution to the world. Because perhaps, perhaps true financial freedom is not about having unlimited money. Perhaps it's about creating a really healthy relationship with money that gives you more choice, more confidence, more freedom, and more opportunity to live and lead in a way that reflects what really, really matters to you.

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That's where I want to go today. So again, let me begin with the question. If money wasn't an issue, what would you do? What would you do? What would you stop doing? Would you, let me ask you, would you stay in the work that you're doing now? Would you speak up more? Because you wouldn't be worried about, you know, losing your job or what people think of you or saying something stupid.
Would you ask for that pay rise? that promotion or the package that you really deserve? Would you perhaps start the business, become a consultant or coach that you've always thought about, but never thought you could really do financially? Would you write the book? Retrain as something? Maybe like me, you had a passion as a child for something and you were told, oh, you know, you can never do that. So you went into a different profession, a more, let's say sensible profession.
But then you managed to have a hobby outside of work where that passion comes out a little bit. But if there was a way for that passion to become a purpose and even a business that you could make money on and be passionate and purposeful, would you do it? Would you devote more of your time to a cause perhaps that you care about? So what becomes really possible in the imagination when you remove the fear of money.
I know this isn't easy to do because it creeps back in really, really fast. But if you're able to put it aside just for a moment and open up and see what happens and you know, maybe you already know the answer. Perhaps it came to you very quickly and then likely almost as quickly another voice appeared which explained to you very sensibly. why it would never work because you need the salary, you have a mortgage, other people depend on you.
You cannot risk what you've built. You would not know how to make money doing the thing you really care about. And that voice is very sensible and has lots to say and is very plausible. And I, you know, it has a point. It's not that it doesn't have a point, but I would say, it's not about ignoring it. It's the sort of thing, okay, I understand all of that is very plausible.
Let me put it aside for a moment and start thinking about what I would do. I mean, maybe you would stay doing exactly what you're doing now because you love it, but still releasing fears about money.

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And even if you think you've got no fears about money, often they're so embedded, you don't even really know that you're doing it. All right. So it's a very personal thing. It's what does money mean to you and what have you allowed it to decide for you? Do you feel uncomfortable wanting more money? Do you ever hear yourself saying it's not about the money and Perhaps it's genuinely not about the money.
I don't hear from women, I want to make more money. It's so rare. It really is. I hear women saying it's not about the money. It's not my main motivation, they'll say. and you care far more about doing a good job and helping people and making a difference and you might feel slightly embarrassed about wanting to earn more and you might worry that asking for more money will make you sound shallow or selfish or materialistic or driven by ego and I've heard versions of this in coaching sessions for years, where capable women can advocate forcefully for everyone else, for a team, a budget, a client, a cause, a community, yet feel really uncomfortable negotiating their own salary or package.
And I wonder whether this is true for you. Can you clearly ask for what your work is worth, or do you quickly explain why the money does not really matter? there's still a gender pay gap out there, we know that. And there's lots of reasons for that which are systemic and not down to the individual woman. But I do believe that we need to become much better at what we're worth, asking for what we're worth and giving us the opening to be able to really step into. the platforms and the places that we need to be able to make that bigger difference to ourselves and others.
Because we often negotiate differently for people around us than we would for ourselves. And we often accept less because we want to appear grateful or reasonable or easy to work with. And, you know, a lot of the times…

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Women are doing like the job of four people at least and getting paid for maybe half a person. And it's just not bloody fair, right? And I think we're doing it because we want to prove that we're really good and we want to, oh, I'm really grateful for being here and all of this, but actually we're worth so much more. And for so many people as well, I wouldn't say especially some of those more powerful. men out there, that when you do negotiate for yourself, you get a lot of respect in doing it.
And it is expected to do that too. So learning how to negotiate for yourself. And of course, when you do that, when you're negotiating for yourself, you're also going to positively impact everyone around you. All right. So money can mean choice and independence and stability and care and education and creativity and generosity and all those things. And wanting those things does not make you shallow. And you don't need to apologise for wanting the resources that allow you to live and contribute more freely.
I do think, though, we need to look at if we're overdoing that because we believe that those resources are so important that we end up sacrificing ourselves. All right. So making good choices and conscious choices about money and understanding why we're doing things. And we're not trying to create a freedom for the future while we're feeling trapped today. All right. Now, what I mean for that is that I hear

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A lot of people will say, well, I'm doing this now and I'm doing this job. I'm miserable doing it, but I'm making some money. So I will be miserable now. I mean, people don't say I'll be miserable now, but that's the sense you get. You'll be miserable now because it promises financial freedom at some point in the future. So there's sort of this delayed happiness, delayed gratification. And so, and I think it's a very old idea.
It's this idea that I'll be miserable and work until I'm 60, 65, 70, and then I'm going to be happy. But by that time, people are exhausted and their bodies are exhausted and mentally they're exhausted and they're sort of, okay, all right, I'm retiring. And now what? In fact, those feelings of being free in retirement. is what so many people want now earlier and earlier in their careers and in their lives.
And they're not willing to sacrifice. Are you willing to sacrifice yourself for the sake of the paycheck? Are you telling yourself that you'll be financially free when you retire, when the mortgage is paid, when the children finish school, when the pension reaches a certain number, or when you have enough saved? Now, Planning for the future of course matters, but how much of your present life are you willing to postpone? And do you actually know what enough means or does the target move every time you get closer to it?
And this is a really, really tricky stuff for us as so many women now are the main earner for ourselves or the main earner in our family or dual earner and We are often sustaining a home and education and travel and healthcare and commitments and a standard of living that matters to you. So none of these choices are automatically right or wrong. The most important question is whether you're choosing them freely.
Okay. And what they require from you to sustain. And taking a moment to

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to sort of audit and saying, all right, what is the financial cost of your life as it is currently designed? And what is the cost in terms of time and energy and health and voice and relationship and purpose? And if nothing changed for five years, how would you feel? So is the future freedom that you're working towards worth the present price that you're paying? And for some people it absolutely is. And I'm, you know, there's no right or wrong others, but I think this is, you know, time to kind of really look at how we feel about money, what our beliefs are about money and how they govern so much, so much of what you do.
Have you made purpose and prosperity opposite things?

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If you want to follow your true passions and be more creative or do something that makes a difference to other people in the world, do you quietly assume that you will have to earn less? And I think this is a massive, massive problem where we believe that it's all or nothing. I'm either in a job where I'm focused on making money for other people. or I'm working for a not-for-profit and only focusing on other people.
And in the former, I'm going to be able to make some money and the latter I won't. And this belief system really has to change. Do you imagine that purposeful work is only charity work or volunteer work or work that requires you to sacrifice your financial safety? Have you created a false choice between making money and making an impact? Because we need to start really bringing those things together wherever you work.
Because if you work in a charity, maybe you're thinking that you can't make money and that's a selfish thing. And if you work in a corporation, maybe you're thinking that you can't make a difference and that's a selfish thing you should say in your job. And actually we just need to bring everyone together and change the thinking. Perhaps you're staying in a job that no longer really feels meaningful or purposeful to you because you believe that you need to stay there for the money.
What if earning well enabled you to bring more meaning and purpose into your current role? What would that look like, I wonder? And outside of your job as well, I mean, talking to a wonderful woman the other day and she was telling me how she was not fully enjoying her job. She'd been passed over for a promotion and we were talking about passion and purpose and in her industry, these are not topics or words that are used very often.
And she was talking about some of the things that she's doing, not only in her current role, but outside. angel investing and working with community groups and really finding that balance of purpose, not in her current role, but also outside. And we were also talking about how to bring it inside as well. So when we have these kinds of conversations with ourselves, we've realized that money, it does not have to be your purpose.
It's one of the resources that makes your purpose possible. Does that make sense?

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Having this integration of money, passion and purpose is a very, very powerful place to be because it releases us and makes us more free. Because when we realise, I don't have to stay in this job. I don't have to stay in this house. I don't have to do anything. In fact, I can do exactly what I want. I might have to pay a price. Someone might get upset or I won't be able to buy those shoes or the kids would have to do something different, but okay.
Like the world isn't going to end. And I think when we have that kind of power, it makes such a bloody difference, right? This is where we kind of can rise up and really, really be who we are. Because I find that, you know, so many women as well, not just men too, I know, I know, I know, but so many women as well were just like… begging, stealing, borrowing for some budget to invest in ourselves or to invest in other people.
Or, you know, we're doing this big, long business case and fighting incredibly hard for relatively small amounts of money, relatively small amounts of budget. Perhaps you've spent weeks putting together a detailed business case for a women's network, for an additional team member, for a training budget, for a piece of technology. or a project that would really improve outcomes of people's lives. And you think it's a lot, but actually when you look at the turnover of your business or the bottom line of your business, it's absolutely tiny, tiny, but we have those same fears that we have personally, they show up professionally.
We can become so accustomed to scarcity thinking, scarcity thinking. rather than this sort of abundance thinking where there is so much money out there in the world, which is very unfairly distributed, but it's out there. It's out there. So why not have some more of it coming to you for what is genuinely needed because you're not someone who's going to buy 17 cars, are you? I don't think you would be listening to my podcast if you are.
You're not someone who's going to be getting the next yacht, are you? You're not someone who's going to be stepping on people to make more money. You're values driven. You want the world to be different. Yes, you're going to pay your bills and yes, you're going to provide the best lifestyle you can for yourself and your family, but you're going to use that money for good. And so you need more, quite frankly.
All right.

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I mean, of course, I know every organization has budget constraints and difficult decisions to make, but I feel like they use it a bit to rule us. You know what I'm saying? And actually, could you imagine at the top, top, top of your organization and the conversations they're having, maybe you're at the top, top, top of your organization and you realize that there is money there to be found for the things that would really be making a difference.
And because this fear becomes so embedded in our culture, in our team cultures, in our organizational cultures, in our local cultures, in our country cultures, that we stop advocating for the resources that we genuinely need to succeed. And then, you know, we're all working incredibly hard, too hard, overwhelmed, and quite frankly, not providing the outcomes that the business needs anyways.

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you know, what would you call it? A vicious circle. Are you frightened that you couldn't make money on your own? Are you someone who has thought about starting a business, becoming a consultant perhaps, or an advisor, a non-exec director, an author, a speaker? Have you thought about creating or working independently? What is your first fear? Often Well, the first thing I always hear is how would I market myself? Where would my clients come from?
Would anyone pay me? Could I ever replace my salary? And these are just questions that I always, I just wish that women could realise the possibility and the potential that you have to do your own thing if that's something that you have been considering. You may have spent years becoming excellent inside a company without ever really needing to be visible, without ever really needing to explain your value. And marketing yourself may feel boastful or arrogant or uncomfortable or completely inauthentic, but actually it isn't.
It doesn't have to be. All right. It doesn't have to be. So learning how to know, first of all, and have trust in yourself. Yes, yes, I could market myself. Yes, clients would come to me. Yes, people would pay me. Look at how many freaking coaches, consultants and small businesses that there are out there. They survive and they do great. All right. So I think that this is something if it frightens you, if visibility frightens you.

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You can practice being seen in ways that feel authentic rather than a performance. You can do things and learn, you can learn, right? You can learn how to price yourself and cost yourself and position yourself. There's a million resources out there. So if you're stopping yourself doing something that could be really impactful, give you the flexibility that you want. give you the life that you want, help you to be more visible and impactful in the world in this next phase of your life and career, then go for it.
There's so many women out there, by the way, also that want to help you, that will be there for you with open arms and say, okay, this is how I did it. And you can listen and you can say, okay, this is maybe how I can, if they can do it, I can do it. Why not? They seem pretty normal. they will be there for you to give you advice and support.
That's how it works. That's how it works. So I want you to ask yourself with all of these things today, whether this is about your career or your life or your organization or your corporation or your charity or a small business or you're a parent or you're a teacher or you work in healthcare or you're an activist and you're trying to change the world for women in parts of the world, where quite frankly, it is awful and incredibly difficult to have any kind of freedom, especially financial, then ask yourself whether the obstacle is truly money or whether money is the name you have given to fears about visibility, rejection, learning, asking for help.

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pricing yourself in terms of your services, if you want to work for yourself, or ultimately, ultimately it's about learning how to trust yourself, to trust yourself. One of my absolute favorite quotes is this one, be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid. And I just love it so much because Sometimes we have to leap before we have all the answers. And when we leap, it's pretty scary, but it's also exhilarating, exhilarating.
And when we leap, those mighty forces, those mighty forces are amazing women around you. They are your community. They are… people that you have never met yet, resources you have never even come across or know about, or whether it is even something bigger than you, a bigger purpose or forces in the world that go, okay, okay, all right, she's leaping. All right, we see now, stop complaining. She stopped being driven by fear.
All right, now, now we're coming in. Now we see you.

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Now we're going to help you. And that is the most powerful thing. So take out a notebook if you can. I'm going to give you nine questions, nine questions. Nine questions is a lot. All right. So you may have to pause and stop and start as we're going through these questions. You do not need perfect answers to these questions. The aim is to turn a large frightening idea called money into facts and fears, choices and next steps.
And as you're answering these questions, I would encourage you to do them very intuitively, write down whatever comes up instantly. And then over the next few days, you can work on this and you can get to where you need to get to. All right. Are you ready? Okay. Question one. I already asked it, but I'm going to ask it again.

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What would you do if money was not the issue? And write the first honest answer down before making it sound sensible. Question two. What are you afraid of will happen? Name the fear. Rather than just writing down, I'm afraid I won't have any money. What is it you're really afraid of? What people will think that you won't be able to provide?

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that other people will struggle as a result. What is it? Be honest with yourself. Write that down. Question three. Now this is a tough one. You're going to have to really take a moment. How much money do you genuinely need each month? I mean, genuinely need each month and include your essential costs and your commitments, future planning, a realistic margin. Now this is where your spreadsheet might come in. You're going to need to actually… perhaps take a bit of time to do that.
It is phenomenal the amount of us that do not know that number. Maybe you have like a really up there amount and then you have a more down there amount and then maybe you set on the middle amount like traffic lights, red, yellow, green. Number four. Another big one. Do you have accurate information about your income and your spending and your debt and your savings and your pension and your insurance and your commitment?
Now I'm not a financial advisor. I don't know what to necessarily should be doing about those. And there's amazing, amazing financial advisors out there, especially for women right now. But do you know what those numbers are? You need to know your numbers. I love numbers. I love it. I was a big maths girl at school. I wasn't very good at maths, but I appreciate maths.

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I liked maths a lot more than I liked like history or economics and stuff like that because I didn't have to write essays in maths. So maths is good. Find out your numbers. Number five, another really tricky one. Are you spending money on things that genuinely matter to you or on things that soothe or impress or distract you to help you cope? I know this is rough. But we do do it, don't we?
We spend money on stuff that is a bit pointless. And if we didn't, then maybe we could do the things we want to do. So maybe spend a week, like looking at that and like, Oh gosh, look at how much I spend on coffee or stupid extra things I don't actually need. Okay. Um, number six, what could change? I'm a big Fans, many of you know, on baby steps, what could change without destroying everything?
So I'm not telling you like, okay, leave your job tomorrow or start a new business next week. Well, there's some of you I know are going to do that, but could you test an idea, like reducing your hours, creating a second income, renegotiating a commitment, simplifying one expense, or maybe…

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Looking for a new, different role in or out of your organization. That was number six. Number seven. I hope you're still with me. Okay. Remember we're looking at intuitive stuff here. Intuitive answers and how you feel about it. I know this is a lot of difficult stuff. A lot of questions too. So you could maybe just pick one or two questions. Number seven. What skills or support would reduce your fear? So go out into the world and ask for help.
Do you need financial advice? Do you need to learn how to budget? There's a million negotiation courses. Do you start networking or business planning? There's so much out there these days and so much of it doesn't even cost anything. So what skills or support would reduce your fear? Okay. All right. Number eight. Okay. This is an important one. What evidence do you have that you can make a change, that you can change how you think or feel about something?

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that you can adapt. I want you to remember some times when you have solved problems and you've created opportunities before. You might not have done it in a financial money sense, but if you can do it in other things, you can do it in this too. And then final question, what is one action, however small, that you can take in the next 48 hours to move forward on this? All right, to become a money magnet in a good way.
All right. Like money is coming to you and you love money and money helps you to make a bigger difference. And you're okay with less money. You're okay with more money. You know, your whole thinking is changing around money because I don't think the next step is money. I think the next step is courage and information and a new skill or changed habit or getting some good financial advice. All right. So

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The goal here is not to stop caring about money. In fact, quite the opposite. I mean, if you're having a relationship with money and you say, I hate money and money doesn't mean anything, then imagine if that was actually a relationship, it wouldn't be going very well, would it? So it's a start to really value it, think about it in different ways and to stop it governing you and having fears and changing how you think and feel on a daily basis.
What would you do if money wasn't an issue? So that's it for today. I really know this is a big topic and probably not something that's going to be solved in half an hour, but go for it. Take some moments to think about it and think about this for yourself, but also think about this for those around you. Make sure that you are encouraging. you're the younger generation to be also to have good beliefs around money because they learn from us like I learnt from my mum and dad and you learn from yours and we learn from the people around us about what money means.
Money does make the world go round but let's make it the world go round in a better way and create a better future for ourselves, for our families, for our organisations, for our communities. even for our countries and this amazing, phenomenal planet that we are inhabiting right now. So thank you so much for listening today to Dr Sam Collins podcast. Let me know how it's going. Remember one action, however small, baby step, baby step in the next 48 hours so that you get going.
Purpose and prosperity are not opposites. Remember, remember, remember. Thank you so much and I will see you next time.

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